Category Archives: Humor

From the Icecap to the Sea

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Aerial view of Kibbutz Kochav Dromi, with newly planted agricultural fields in the foreground

From the Icecap to the Sea

A guest-essay by Langwill Cadwalader
April 1, 2024

In 2010 the first Israeli scientists and technicians founded what eventually became Kibbutz Kochav Dromi. Fourteen years later, the little village they established has grown and prospered, and now boasts a population of 1,251 that includes families with children.

Kochav Dromi (Hebrew for “Southern Star”) is located on the coast of Antarctica just south of the Antarctic Circle, between Zhongshan Station and Davis Station on the shoreline of Prydz Bay, facing the Cooperation Sea. It consists of a small cluster of buildings and structures designed to withstand long months of severe winter weather. Houses and storage buildings are built with reinforced walls, and are partially recessed into the ground to help them retain heat.

Despite the rigors of the climate, the inhabitants of Kochav Dromi follow their daily routines year round. There is a school, a commissary, and a synagogue for worship services. In the warmer months the children are able to engage in sporting activities on a small playing field.

The most remarkable thing about Kibbutz Kochav Dromi is that it is practicing agriculture. Several types of crops are planted and harvested each year during the brief growing season, and the kibbutz hopes to become self-sufficient within the next decade.

When they first landed at the site of Kochav Dromi, the early arrivals found a wasteland of barren scree between the ice dome and the shoreline. In order to be able to farm the land under these inhospitable conditions, scientists contrived to alter the micro-climate in that little portion of Prydz Bay. This was accomplished by injecting genetically modified plankton beneath the ice sheets that lie most of the year between the offshore islands and the mainland. The specially designed plankton have a greatly accelerated rate of metabolism, which raises the temperature of the seawater slightly. In turn, the warmer water allows a dome of mild, moist air to form over the shore, bringing just enough additional heat to permit the planting of crops — notably soybeans, alfalfa, and sorghum — all of them also genetically modified for the short growing season. Eventually the farmers hope to be able to grow enough modified grass so that flocks of sheep and goats may be established.

The determined men and women who established the kibbutz did so in hopes of providing a sanctuary for Jews from all over the world, who now face persecution and violence everywhere outside of Israel, and are increasingly beleaguered in Israel itself. It was hoped that Kibbutz Kochav Dromi would offer a new beginning for Jews, where they would no longer find their lives and well-being constantly threatened.

Unfortunately for the residents of Kochav Dromi, however, those hopes may not be realized. As the kibbutz prospered and grew, hostility to its presence grew concomitantly. Various groups that advocate on behalf of Antarctica, most of them sponsored by Soros-affiliated organizations, have launched protests against the kibbutz in multiple cities in Australia, Europe, and North America. The most prominent of these groups is an organization dedicated to penguins’ rights, the Penguin Protection League (PPL), which is headquartered in Melbourne, with chapters in London, Amsterdam, Rome, Stockholm, Hamburg, New York, and Ottawa. These groups regularly stage demonstrations in front of Israeli embassies and consulates, attracting heavy media coverage. Unruly crowds of protesters may be heard chanting various slogans in unison, among them:

From the icecap to the sea,
Antarctica shall be free!

Advocates for penguins’ rights maintain that penguins have been displaced from their ancestral homeland in the region around Kibbutz Kochav Dromi, and have been forced to resettle in crowded unhygienic refugee areas, where food is less plentiful. Many of them are said to have starved or frozen to death.


Displaced penguins, many of them frozen or starved to death

The PPL chartered a fishing vessel last year and attempted to take their protest to Kibbutz Kochav Dromi itself. However, they encountered pack ice that froze into a sheet unusually early in the season, trapping and holding the boat. The crew issued a distress call, and the PPL passengers had to be rescued by an icebreaker operated by the Australian navy.

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I’ve Just Seen a Face I Can’t Forget

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I was browsing through Philadelphia crime reports and came across this image in the header of a press release issued by the city’s district attorney:


(Click to enlarge)

The contents of the press release are unimportant. What I’m interested in is the little face peering from between the breasts of Lady Justice.

Who is that creature, and why does he appear in such intimate propinquity with the bosom of the damsel of blind justice?

Is he an angel? A demon? Maybe a homunculus growing from his hostess’s breastbone?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Readers who have any idea of what we may be looking at here are invited to leave suggestions in the comments. Speculation is fine, but I’m hoping someone who is local to Philly may have a first-hand acquaintance with this statue, which is probably in the courthouse.

My greatest concern, of course, is that the little imp may be sexually harassing Lady Justice. We can’t have that, now, can we?

A Fine Synthetic Brogue

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When Dymphna died, she took almost all of the Irishness of this blog with her, since I have no more than a wee dram of Irish blood in my veins. However, to honor her memory and keep up the traditions, here’s a small St. Patrick’s Day post.

I’ve posted this poem before, but it’s been (I think) fourteen years, so it’s time for an accord of repetition. It’s by the late great Ogden Nash, who I suspect was no more Irish than I am. But still, he did a good job of poking a finger in the eye of the modern commercialized cult of St. Paddy’s Day:

It’s a Grand Parade It Will Be, Modern Design

by Ogden Nash

Saint Patrick was a proper man, a man to be admired;
Of numbering his virtues I am never, never tired.
A handsome man, a holy man, a man of mighty deeds,
He walked the lanes of Erin, a-telling of his beads.
A-telling of his beads, he was, and spreading of the word.
I think that of Saint Patrick’s Day, Saint Patrick hadn’t heard.

The saint was born a subject of the ancient British throne,
But the Irish in their wisdom recognized him as their own.
A raiding party captured him, and carried him away,
And Patrick loved the Irish, and he lived to capture they,
A-walking of the valleys and a-spreading of the word.
I think that of Saint Patrick’s Day, Saint Patrick hadn’t heard.

He defied the mighty Druids, he spoke them bold and plain,
And he lit the Easter fire on the lofty hill of Shane.
He lit the Easter fire where the hill and heaven met,
And on every hill in Ireland the fire is burning yet.
He lit the Easter fire, a-spreading of the word.
I think that of Saint Patrick’s Day, Saint Patrick hadn’t heard.

Saint Patrick was a proper man before be was a saint,
He was shaky in his Latin, his orthography was quaint,
But he walked the length of Ireland, her mountains and her lakes,
A-building of his churches and a-driving out the snakes,
A-building of his churches and a-spreading of the word.
I think that of Saint Patrick’s Day, Saint Patrick hadn’t heard.

But the silver-tongued announcer is a coy, facetious rogue;
He ushers in Saint Patrick with a fine synthetic brogue,
He spatters his commercials with macushlas and colleens,
Begorras, worra-worras, and spurious spalpeens.
I hope one day Saint Patrick will lean down from Heaven’s arch
And jam the bloody air waves on the Seventeenth of March.

German Comedian Says: Bash the Fash!

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It seems the German establishment is moving closer to a ban on the AfD (Alternative für Deutschland, Alternative for Germany). A regime toady in the media is encouraging violence against “right-wing extremists” — a necessary step in the direction of a full ban on the party. Demonize first, then attack, and finally outlaw it: that’s the game plan.

Many thanks to Hellequin GB for translating this article from the online news portal Nius. The translator’s comments are in square brackets:

Kerkeling uses children’s films to glorify violence against right-wingers: “Ready to fight! You can’t end fascism through discussion!”

He wrote “I’ll be off then” and is afraid of “He’s back”!

In an interview with the news portal t-online, the German comedian Hape Kerkeling speaks of his fear that the AfD would turn Germany into a “dictatorship” after an election victory and thinks out loud about the fact that, beyond words and arguments, people “must be ready to fight.”

Kerkeling wants to ban the AfD

Kerkeling advocates banning the AfD as a lesson from history: “It should be avoidable today to allow the right to come to power in the first place. All I hear is that it would be too risky to ban this party. I find this argument to be downright grotesque. We have a basic law and that is clear. The legislature wanted to prevent the Federal Republic of Germany from ever becoming a dictatorship again. We are now faced with the problem, with the real possibility that Germany will become a dictatorship and within a very short period of time. The situation has never been so risky. Why don’t we try to ban the party?”

Given the rise of Alice Weidel’s AfD, Kerkeling sees the “real possibility” that Germany will become a dictatorship. [Says one that has been part and parcel of establishing another socialist dictatorship in Germany. Shows you again that these people that live close by the manger have only their own overflowing feeding frenzy trough at heart.]

Kerkeling does not differentiate between right-wing and right-wing extremists; he consistently speaks of “right-wingers,” which he would also fight against: “Because that is the enemy that can be identified most clearly at the moment. So defensive force used judiciously would be directed against them.” [Well, haven’t they already established their own brand of violent brown-shirts for decades and call them “Anti-fascists” to gull the gullible?]

There would be “fundamental truths and values” in Germany that everyone would have agreed on. “That must always be the basis of our society. I can no longer reach anyone who strays from this with rhetoric. But there are other means, tried and tested means. History has shown what the effective means are. In any case, I can’t remember fascism ever being ended through discussion.” [Then I would advise him to do us all a favour and blow his “brain” out in front of a mirror if he wants to kill fascists.]

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The Bum’s Rush

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The video below is a blast from the past. I don’t remember when it was first uploaded, but it was well over a decade ago. It was a Vlad/KGS collaboration, and was posted on one of Vlad’s many YouTube channels, all of which have long since been taken down.

Vlad found the old video file and uploaded it to Rumble. It’s great to see it again, because it’s a real classic:

Bad Juju in Bad Ischl

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Many thanks to Hellequin GB for translating this article from eXXpress. The translator’s comments are in square brackets:

Explosive argument: Big fuss over pork slogan in front of restaurant in Bad Ischl

Excitement in Bad Ischl! The trigger is a host known for his funny sayings. His text about people who eat pork is explosive. And in the eyes of some, it went too far, given the already tense political climate. Others agree with the restaurant owner.

A sign outside his restaurant reads: “People who eat pork are statistically less likely to blow themselves and others up.” A provocation that is of course primarily aimed at Muslims. There is already a lot of excitement online, where pictures of the saying are spreading rapidly. Some feel “deeply disappointed and attacked”, others see “pure racism”. [Islam is an ideology and not a race, MORON.] In a free newspaper, a reader said that reading this text took his breath away, and called for “messages of peace;” after all, the situation was already very tense. [Appeasing Islam has worked so well for us during the last 1,400+ years, hasn’t it? Are people really that willfully blind and ignorant of what Islam and its followers stand for?]

Lots of approval online

However, the opinions are not as clearly distributed as the rapporteurs want to convey. If you look at the comment columns, it is quite clear that the innkeeper also receives a lot of support. “It’s a bit harsh, but unfortunately he’s right,” says one user on Facebook. “Sometimes the truth hurts,” writes another. “He’s absolutely right,” many people say.

Afterword from the translator:

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Palestinian Jokes

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This post has been recycled from more than seventeen years ago, but somehow the jokes remain relevant.

So this Palestinian walks into a bar and sits down.

The bartender says, “What’ll it be, pal?”

The Palestinian goes, “BOOM!”

*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

An American, an Israeli, and a Palestinian are marooned on a desert island.

The American goes to one side of the island and builds a church.

The Israeli goes to the other side of the island and builds a synagogue.

The Palestinian goes, “BOOM!”

*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

A Palestinian travelling salesman is driving through the countryside when his car breaks down in the middle of the night.

He goes up to the nearest farmhouse and knocks on the door.

The farmer comes to the door and says, “What can I do for you, mister?”

The Palestinian…

Aw, heck! So you heard that one already, huh?

Pinkwashing the Perps

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In the Netflix fantasy world, criminals in Berlin must be native Germans, and never culture-enrichers. The reality of life on the streets of Berlin doesn’t matter — only the PC narrative is allowed.

Many thanks to Hellequin GB for translating this article from AUF1. The translator’s comments are in square brackets:

Politically correct Netflix censorship: German perpetrators instead of criminal migrants

Netflix actually wanted to film the bestseller “Sun and Concrete” by the German comedian Felix Lobrecht. But in times of “sensitive reading”, cancel culture and strict political correctness, what happened was what had to happen: the streaming provider demanded changes to the script. For example, no criminal migrants were allowed to appear in it. [It’s supposed to be fiction, and reality should not intrude.]

In their place, Netflix would rather have a German — and also lesbian — girlie group. “Sensitive content” was also allegedly revised in other passages and seemed to have been redlined.

“Deep into woke lunacy”

As Die Welt reports, Lobrecht reacts in horror: “The fiction department at Netflix is completely crazy. They’re really deep into this woke lunacy,” the newspaper quotes him saying. The company’s strict line was particularly disappointing for him because Netflix had broadcast his past comedy program “Hype”.

However, there was no collaboration for his current program “All you can eat”. In his podcast “Gemischtes Hack/Mixed Minced Meat” (together with Tommi Schmitt), Lobrecht mentioned that Netflix wanted to pay less than for his “Hype” show — even though he was much less known back then.

Content distorted

But the worst thing was the changes to the literary template for “Sonne und Beton/Sun and Concrete”, which distorted the entire content of the book — that typical Berlin migrants were to be turned into German perpetrators and girls.

“What kind of girl gang? What kind of German gangsters?”, says Lobrecht angrily. “Imagine, Hakan and Hamudi are standing on the corner of Sonnenallee and suddenly Holger and Jens come along. Are you crazy? It’s just nuts!” The film adaptation isn’t happening — and the comedian finally decided to finance his new comedy program himself.

Afterword from the translator:

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Love Among the Mantises

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I occasionally like to quote the words of my namesake: Unspiek, Baron Bodissey, whose writings may be found in the fiction of Jack Vance. The Baron is not a character in those books, but rather a literary reference. Excerpts from his works appear in footnotes and chapter headings, and he is occasionally quoted by characters in the books.

The following quote is from the heading of Chapter 3 in The Book of Dreams, the final novel of the Demon Princes pentalogy:

From Life, Volume I, by Unspiek, Baron Bodissey:

…I often reflect upon the word “morality,” the most troublesome and confusing word of all.

There is no single or supreme morality; there are many, each defining the mode by which a system of entities optimally interacts.

The eminent entomologist Fabre, observing a mantis in the act of devouring its mate, exclaimed: “What an abominable custom!”

The ordinary man, during a day’s time, may be obliged to act by the terms of a half-dozen different moralities. Some of these acts, appropriate at one moment, may the next moment be considered obscene or opprobrious in terms of another morality.

The person who, let us say, expects generosity from a bank, efficient flexibility from a government agency, open-mindedness from a religious institution will be disappointed. In each purview the notions represent immorality. The poor fool might as quickly discover love among the mantises.

Things to Come — Life in Woke Britain

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Seneca III sends this acerbic little vignette from Modern Intersectional England.

Things to Come — Life in Woke Britain

by Seneca III

Last month my Bin Day was blessed with some half-decent weather and I was out tidying up the front garden and my compulsory edible weed patch when the ‘sanitary operatives’ came with their monochromatic prideless garbage truck. The next thing I noticed was how hard they grafted, running house to house, hefting heavy bins to the truck and then joyfully throwing the empties to the pavement in front of the houses without pausing. And then, suddenly, I realised that there was something about this scenario that made my blood to run cold and caused me to begin to question my senses — were they all horribly white males exercising their critical heterosexual cisgendered privileged patriarchateness in full view, or had I somehow slipped into a different, pre-enlightenment space-time continuum?

Confusing, to say the least, so I had to look again just to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. I wasn’t; there was not a single transgender bloke in a frock (complete with a small penis) amongst them! Nor could I see a BAME, a Stonewaller, a Mermaid, a rainbow-coloured unicorn, an OAP or a Drag Queen in falsies and suspenders throwing tampons dipped in tomato sauce at the two young children playing in their garden a few houses down from me.

Having sat down for a moment to regather my strength by consuming a 3D printed slug sandwich washed down with a refreshing draught of grasshopper milk, I phoned my local Thought Constabulary to report a whole series of hate crimes… sexism, racism, ageism, heterocolourphobism, breathing heavily, working hard with unpainted fingernails and engaged in a public demonstration of masculinity that I thought was a long-gone dark chapter in our nation’s history.

As is normal, the overworked heroes at our local Plodshop took over three hours to respond, but later called to apologise and explain that they had all been otherwise engaged either practising the Macarena or terrorising autistic children for not using correctspeak when referring to their Nanas.

Consequently, as all actions are said to have an equal and opposite reaction, I have decided to open a new type of welfare agency. Its name will be ‘Jobs for Deviants’ and it will offer employment entailing two hours light work a day for three days a week at the same generous salary as our National Death Service Diversity Managers, irrespective of personal pronouns.

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A Follow-Up on Marinus van der Lubbe

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In the intro to last night’s post on Marinus van der Lubbe (the Dutch council communist who was executed by the Nazis for allegedly setting fire to the Reichstag in 1933), I mentioned that there had been a reference to Mr. Van der Lubbe in an old Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers strip, but that I was unable to find my copy of it.

A reader whose collection includes that very strip (from about 1970) was kind enough to dig it out and send me a photo of it. I’ve excerpted the last eight panels below. The relevant quote is in the penultimate panel:

Yesterday I quoted it as “Long live the Marinus van der Lubbe International Firebombing Society!” It looks like I remembered it correctly…