Many thanks to JLH for translating this essay by Matthias Matussek from Henryk Broder’s website Die Achse des Guten:
Why I Am a Nazi
by Matthias Matussek
August 31, 2019
I am a Nazi. God knows I am not proud of it, especially since it would be a grim, indeed the grimmest, hubris to claim that. Yes, I know what the Nazis did. They marched out in columns or hordes and attacked political opponents. They took a gloating pleasure in denunciation. They betrayed friendships and made sure that their friends were loaded onto trucks and taken to camps and murdered.
They bent over articles and books, not for the joy of reading, but to find “evidence” which could bring the authors into conflict with competitors, deprive them of office and make them objects of scorn. Their writings would be burned, because they did not adhere to the prescribed political line.
I have never denounced a human being because he celebrated his birthday with dubious fellows I didn’t know. “Better to turn someone in to the authorities than end up on the wrong side of things” has never been my way.
Nonetheless, I am a Nazi. Henryk Broder advised me to write that. We were at the Zurich summer WorldWeek festival where there were a lot of other Nazis, for instance our colleague, Alex Bauer, who had been beaten by Antifa and put in the hospital. And where there are Antifa, there are Nazis — you know, where there’s smoke, there’s fire.
We Nazis are multiplying to stay abreast of things, so those who are eager to extinguish us multiply like a brush fire. You could almost surmise that they start fires themselves, just to have something to do.
It was difficult, learning to be a Nazi. I was recognized as a Nazi for the first time by a young lady with blue hair and multiple piercings. It was when I went to a campaign event held by Mr. Gauland of the AfD, whom I had known until then only from television.
I did not have a clue that he was the chair of a, well… of the Nazi party, which as Messiah Schulz shouted out in the Bundestag, belonged “on the ash heap of history.” He got that formulation from Trotsky, who had dealt harshly with counterrevolutionaries.
“Piss off, you Nazi”
I was making my way to Gauland’s campaign appearance through a cordon of bushwhacking, spitting and swearing Antifa partisans, when a girl pressed a note into my hand. I thought it was one of these messages from a Chinese fortune cookie. Maybe her telephone number.
But no. It said: “Piss off, you Nazi.”
I gave it back and said, “Sorry, I’m not a Nazi.” She looked at me bewildered, as I did her.
The next time, I was standing around among Hamburg citizens on the Jungfernstieg, an upscale shopping avenue on [the banks of] the Alster, to take part in a “Merkel has to go” demonstration. The Hamburg Morgenpost-Online — yes, the one with the ads for call girls — announced that where we were standing, neo-Nazis had gathered while hundreds of peaceful counter-demonstrators were marching.