The following essay is an entertaining take by a Hungarian writer on last month’s presidential election.

Many thanks to CrossWare for translating this piece from the Hungarian daily Magyar Idők:

Hillary Clinton Screwed Over Trump for Good

by Orbán János Dénes
December 3, 2016

I realized what led to the death of liberalism. We have an old saying: a lot of talk kills the thing. It’s amazing that a liberal group can produce a tsunami of talk regarding any topic. In the liberal world, in order for a decision to be taken — even an obvious decision, in which common sense would suffice — first-impact studies and dozens of draft must be made ready, then masses of conferences, meetings and post-conference discussions must take place.

Each time they wave a Gordian knot, which of course they cannot then untangle, ergo the problem remains unresolved. Somehow they are unable to engage in easy and clear thinking, as if it were tacky to do so. The simple folks — who of course are primitive, redneck single-cell morons — shake their heads, being unable to understand what’s so complicated and why we should further complicate it, and most importantly, why should we continue yakking about it until nobody knows what is going on.

Then a leading personality shows up and simply cuts the Gordian knot, and thereby gains the support of the simple folks; they call him a “populist”. This is a swear word in the liberal dictionary. (Pretty lame though, the previous ones were more punchy.)

According to liberal thinking, “lots of talk kills things”, “too much talk = poverty” and “silence is golden” are primitive, clichéd phrases, not timeless folk wisdom. They talk and talk and talk, until any decent person’s head starts to hurt and his nerves are inflamed. Then he doesn’t want to take any more of this twaddle, and they say to hell with the whole company, together with its ideas. Anything repeated ad nauseam will cause an extreme backlash. Excessive political correctness led to a surfeit, the holocaust rhetoric caused an overdose of anti-Semitism, and homophobia arose from the overdrive propaganda about sexual minorities.

For almost a month we have known that the next President of the United States will be Donald Trump. This is the biggest event of the year and a huge surprise. They say every miracle lasts only three days. Sure, for a larger miracle, let’s give it a week. But I beg of you, notice it’s more than three weeks later and the squealing and brawling just do not want to end, as American liberal intellectual snowflakes cannot accept the result of a democratic election.

Uncomprehending, looking for an explanation, hysterical and more and more embarrassing and ridiculous manifestations emerge daily. Now, for example, in recent weeks a CNN article was pushed under my nose on Facebook, with a Trump-themed centennial. The one-time standard, a pioneering media outlet, now sunk to the level of a tenaciously struggling propaganda channel; and they publish and advertise any idiocy where Trump can be shown in a negative light.

There’s an ominous article written by one Rachel Sklar, who of course — it goes without saying — is a Clinton campaign activist and volunteer, according to the bio from her publicist. Trump is incredibly jealous of one person as ballyhooed in the article. And who is Trump jealous of? Of course it is none other than Hillary Clinton. Hillary because she is relentlessly popular, as evidenced by the two million extra votes.

And why he is green with envy? Please hold onto your hats! — because Trump was bluffing. He actually did not want to be president. Just wanted to troll; he did it for the sake of good, outrageous fun and he really just wanted more people to vote for him, but he not want to be president. In fact, he hated the idea of dealing with presidential tasks, while living in a far more modest presidential suite than his own, and he did not want to give up his businesses and stuff. Well now he is royally screwed! Oh, merciful father, do not leave me! This was pushed by Rachel Sklar on the CNN portal for millions of readers. And no kidding, this screed does not have as much humor and self-irony in it as the contents of a Slovak-Russian dictionary. She seriously thinks this!

I repeat, to make it more easily understood: the actual, metaphysical winner of this is the cunning Hillary, who screwed over that dupe Trump. She took the majority of votes, but pushed away the uncomfortable, smelly job of President and that lousy crib in the White House. Now she chuckles into her hand, while she can finally play with her cats and dogs and finally play the horny games with her husband, so he no longer needs Monica Lewinsky’s dangerous lips.

The possible version in which her ladyship alternates between fits of rage and hysterical crying, and between cat pestering sessions she uses a Trump voodoo doll to prick with needles, she utters not a word. In liberal discourse something either has a single color or just a single flip side.

I mentioned in my previous articles that I’m having trouble taking Trump seriously, and I was just rooting for him because her ladyship’s thirst for power is greater than even Islamic fanaticism, and because I think of perverted and cretinous liberalism as the ultimate bore. But the more these idiots’ unproductive discussions are pushed in my face, and the more that straitjackets needs to be prepared for hysterical activists who have epileptic seizures because a democratic election was not won by their favorite, the more and more likeable he becomes.

I suspect I’m not alone, and if tomorrow they were to repeat the US presidential election, Trump would win a knockout victory because of this unsightly hysteria. This diarrhea of words would trigger any normal human being to do the opposite of what is suggested, and for certain this was one of the main reasons for the election loss. Rachel Sklar’s woefully inept writing is an excellent disease symptom of a perverse, warped ideological trend that practically drowned in its own indigestible and unbearably vast quantity of words.