Many thanks to Hellequin GB for translating this article from Ansage.org. The translator’s comments are in square brackets:
Now Mineral Water Has Also Become a “Climate Killer”
In the joint large-scale undertaking of an informal ideological Stasi made up of scientists, NGOs and state-related institutions to scour the entire everyday life of Germans for climate-damaging consumption habits and behavior in order to feed the results of the political decision-making process for the gradual implementation of a totalitarian climate dictatorship, no area of life and no detail is spared: The “non-profit” association “a tip:tap” recently commissioned a remarkable study on the climate damage caused by sparkling water. Somebody must have noticed that sparkling water equals carbon dioxide equals CO2 — which is essential for life (on Earth), but deemed a “climate killer” and thus as a trace gas, an alleged “environmental toxin”, for whose symbolic “reduction” Germany is wildly prepared to sacrifice its civilizational prosperity.
The result of the study followed as expected: it now also declares drinking mineral water to be a climate sin. Because: Its consumption in Germany consumes around 1.5 times as much CO2 as the entire domestic German air traffic, calculate the green flunky scientists. Even during its production, mineral water requires many more process steps than tap water because it has to be cleaned after treatment and bottled under higher standards. In addition, the production of the bottles, the transport to the supermarket and the way home from there drive emissions even further up. Overall, according to the study, mineral water produces 202.74 g of CO2 equivalents per liter — tap water, on the other hand, only 0.35 g. This means that still water performs around 586 times better than bottled mineral water.
Inquisition and abjuration mechanisms
Extrapolated to the annual consumption in Germany, which is currently 181.4 liters per capita, and a population of over 83 million, this would add up to three million tons of CO2. Of course: an intolerable situation! The green regulators and prohibition high priests are in demand! Therefore — and in order to promote a climate-friendly way of life — the association logically calls for a switch to consumption limited solely to tap water. Support for this next plan for paternalism and restricting freedom comes from the radical left-wing ZDF [public broadcaster] dirt-slinger Jan Böhmermann: He had already taken up the issue in a typical agitprop manner and also used the opportunity to launch one of his slanderous sweeping attacks — this time against the water provider and well builder “Viva con Agua”.
Among other things, Böhmermann complained that the company not only dared to produce mineral water, but also had no workers’ council and paid its employees too poorly. According to today’s inquisition and abjuration mechanisms, ”Viva con Agua” immediately rolled over and publicly announced that they would fully support drinking more tap water in Germany in the future. The company management also bowed and submissively justified itself that the employees in the filling plant had not previously asked for the formation of a workers’ council and were paid according to the applicable industry standards. This climate of high-handed public accusations and flaunted remorse, along with a bad conscience, does not bode well: It is not impossible that the Greens will start a campaign for a mineral water ban and order the future consumption of only tap water — or better yet, collected rainwater. [And I’m pretty sure that people will have to pay for that water according to the yearly rainfall, and I’m pretty sure that Coca-Cola will be exempt from this madness, too.]
Afterword from the translator:
You can educate a fool, but you cannot make him think, and that’s the Greens and their climate freaks in a nutshell.
I take it that breweries will be forcibly closed down next, after all, in a good Pilsener, Lager and all the other different types of beer, are plenty of CO2 bubbles. Also, then these Champagne Socialists will have to stop drinking their Moet & Chandon, Bollinger, Veuve Clicquot, Krug and all that other bubbly wine they love so much, and that, as we all know is not going to happen. These people are not just idiots, they are extremely dangerous idiots that will not just stop after they had destroyed peoples livelihoods, in the end they will start killing off those they deem a “climate hazard”. And that will be everyone who doesn’t belong to their Death Cult. Maybe it’s time to introduce them all to the Grim Reaper in person. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind taking them on — after all, they are after his sibling LIFE and the one cannot exist without the other. Ergo, they are an existential threat to DEATH.
Just say no to bubbles.
These fools have really stepped in it now.
They risk angering the homosexual front; after all, what will they guzzle when Perrier is banned for the good of climate change?
CO2 is NOT a pollutant. Is this irrational and ignorant belief the result of our abysmal educational system?
I had foolishly thought that the subjects I had been taught in the 50s,60s and 70s had been taught, maybe with updates, to subsequent intakes of pupils and students. But it seems that’s not so.
Ironic isn’t it.
An increase in CO2 would lead to increased plant growth, far northern latitudes becoming habitable, and an increase in plankton growth leading to more sea life.
As to the abysmal education system, an unbiased observer couldn’t help but conclude that the only logical explanation is that it’s meant to be that way by design.
“Is this irrational and ignorant belief the result of our abysmal educational system?”
You betcha! Read Bloom’s “Closing of the American Mind” for the all-too-gory details. I wish I could post jpgs here, because I’ve got scads of facebook screenshots going back to ’08 predicting most of what’s currently being cited here. As many here’re already aware, I fear there’s a reckoning coming—between non-hyphenated American citizens and the hyphenators and their anti-American comrades…..and it probably ain’t gonna be pretty….for anybody.
simply foolish. one litre of sparkling water weighs 1.20274 Kilo grams. even the kookaburras are struck dumb.
I have not bothered to go into the sources of this brainfart, but superficially I can’t detect whether they factored in that CO2 which is added under pressure to mineral water gets taken out of the atmosphere first? That would be typical for the machinations of these people, to leave out some important bit of information which would make their deceptive presentations much less impressive. — As a sidenote, I have stopped consuming carbonated drinks many years ago, but only because it really isn’t good for the stomach.
Bottled water everywhere in third world countries due to unsafe drinking water. Most ends up as pollution in rivers and then into the ocean. Bottled water is probably responsible for most plastic ocean pollution and from third world. Telling half the world they can’t have bottled water which saves their lives is a bit rich. I assume it is OK if bubble free?
Bottled water (carbonated or not) is wasteful, and arguably unnecessary where there is a safe mains supply, but as the Baron says, to be consistent one should ban many other drinks, alcoholic or not.
Yes, for consistency many other beverages would have to be banned as well. Which is likely the intention once the camel’s nose is inside the tent.
Of course if one wants to go on a banning spree then I would suggest that there’s more bang for the buck banning gigantic pickup trucks, motor homes, private jet travel and owning multiple houses. All of those annoy me to varying degrees and bans could be justified on saving the environment or energy saving grounds.
But bans are the wrong way to go, and the true purpose of bans when suggested by these groups or the elites is always limiting the freedoms of commoners regardless of the justifications proffered.
The point is the central modification and control of mass behavior. And it seems to be working fine. The excuses do not have to be true — on the contrary, actually.
“Must be Something in the Water”
I think this misses the ocean for the spring.
If you’ve got an hour to spare—it’ll be the best hour you’ve ever spared—watch this old video and listen VERY carefully. It’s a primer on today’s Obamerica and what we’re facing. There’s a reason today’s sophisticates’re just commie-toddlers-in-drag and Sayet’ll give you a primer. Watch..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDb3sTwD_vA&t=453s