And These Are Just the First Five… Posted on July 6, 2006 by Baron Bodissey A friend of mine sent me this today.
That’s a good one… I stumbled across the one below yesterday…
Abu al-Zarqawi died.
George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates. He slapped him across the face and yelled, “How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive and fought so hard for!”
Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, “You wanted to end our liberties but you failed!”
James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, “This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!”
Thomas Jefferson was next, beat al-Zarqawi with a long cane and snarled, “It was Evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence.”
The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe, and 66 other early Americans unleashed their anger on the terrorist leader.
As al-Zarqawi lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared.
Al-Zarqawi wept and said, “This is not what you promised me.”
The Angel replied, “I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said?”
Best laugh I have had in days! And right on point.
Ol’ Z is in front of the blackboard at this very moment, starting on hid 15,000th rendition in chalk of “I will not blow people up. I will not behead them. I realize we are all God’s children. I will behave for eternity.”
Meanwhile he is sniveling to Sister Mary Agnes, “please keep those Virginians away from me. They’re mean. Sob.”
Thank you for your post. I am proud that my son is now a Virginian. He graduated from the Catholic University in WashDC (Sodom on the Patomac)last year. He now lives in Arlington, and works in Fairfax, VA.