Long-time readers will remember JLH as the tireless volunteer who over the years has translated hundreds of thousands of words in German for Gates of Vienna. However, he is also known for writing whimsical verse, in the tradition of Edward Lear and Ogden Nash. Below is his latest offering.

The Wonderful Land of Odd

by JLH

Oh, come with me to the Land of Odd,
Where everything’s Green, even if it’s not.
Where mighty turbines harness the gale
And create great power, unless they fail.

And if they, frozen, come crashing down,
Strewn like corpses on the ground,
They testify to the might of Man,
And everything he thinks he can.

Great solar panels with solar blaze,
Transmogrified before our gaze,
Send volts and watts through stubborn amps
To light up many hundred lamps.

So if they fry a few hundred birds,
The only laments will be from nerds,
Who follow the birds with cameras high,
To record their flight across the sky.

Mother Nature cannot avert,
What’s happening under her very skirt.
Global Warming is undeniable.
The science, we know, is quite reliable.

The Antarctic will be a swimming pool.
The Arctic will not be quite that cool.
The sea will swallow the coasts of the world.
Where children once frolicked tides will swirl.

But fear not, friend, we have your back.
Fixing it takes a simple hack.
Get rid of coal and oil and gas
And other things that will not last.

And if wind and sun no longer serve
To flatten the climatological curve,
Go out in the woods and pick,
When need is great, a bunch of sticks.

They’ll make a fire to warm and cook—
A little smoke we can overlook.
Renewable resource is now what matters.
Ignore the bacon when it spatters.

But save the grease to fry the eggs,
And do not throw away the dregs.
We’ll mix them into our pancake dough
And what comes next, you never know.