Oh, the Humanity!

This morning I was rummaging through a kitchen cabinet and came across the following product, left over from the days when Dymphna was mistress of the kitchen:

It took me aback. Could it be possible that this item is actually on sale in America? Wouldn’t it cause incidents of mass triggering in supermarket aisles?

“Just Whites” is marketed as being wholesome and healthy — all natural, cholesterol free, fat free, sugar free, etc. But I am not so easily fooled. Everyone knows that Whiteness = Toxicity.

It don’t know how old the can is. Some of Dymphna’s foodstuffs are decades old, especially those on the spice shelves. This one is new enough to have a barcode, but old enough not to have a QR code.

It made me curious, so I did a quick search online. It’s listed on Amazon, but is “currently unavailable”. A poster on a food-related forum back in 2015 complained that Just Whites, one of her favorite products, was no longer being sold. So maybe the management at Deb El went through diversity training, wised up, and got Woke.

By the way: “Deb El” sounds suspiciously Hebraic, but it turns out to be a composite of the names of the founders, Elliot Gibber and his wife Debbie. Nevertheless, Gibber is probably a Jewish name, so I reckon this supposedly innocuous product is in fact a Jewish conspiracy to trigger people of color.

Don’t be taken in. It’s time to stand tall and resist the Whiteness!

7 thoughts on “Oh, the Humanity!

  1. Racist hatecrime! Wrongthink, badfeelz.
    I’m clutching my pearls and contacting comrade kommissar Dorsey.
    The intelligent wise birthing people (wymyns) council will be notified as well.
    You are unpersoned by photochopping out of all photos and banished to the landfill of the glorious people’s republic of Wakanda.
    Stacy Abrams/Whoopi Goldberg 2024, yes we can!

  2. Wait until the diversity squad finds out there are products for *GASP* whitening teeth

  3. Me, I just love white Chocolate, I like milk chocolate too, but I an not too keen on dark chocolate. However, I am no longer allowed any, so I suppose it is irrelevant.

    No hate speech here constable……

  4. American guy: What’s the difference between this stuff and whole eggs?
    Mexican guy: No joke.

  5. “The goal of abolishing the white race is, on its face, so desirable that some may find it hard to believe that it could incur any opposition other than from committed white supremacists…
    Make no mistake about it: we intend to keep bashing the dead white males, and the live ones, and the females too, until the social construct known as ‘the white race’ is destroyed.”

    Professor Noel Ignatiev: Harvard Magazine – September/October 2002

  6. Egg whites are healthier, especially if you have fat or cholesterol problems, and that’s no yolk, just a pun.

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