Creative Self-Defense in Israel

In the midst of the new wave of Palestinian stabbing attacks, Israelis have learned to be creative in their self-defense. And they haven’t lost their sense of humor.

The following clip is from the satirical Israeli TV show “Wonderland”. Many thanks to D@rLin|{ for the translation, and to Vlad Tepes for the subtitling:

Transcript:

0:00   You know, because of the situation people want to protect themselves,
0:04   but there is no more pepper to be found!
0:08   No pepper gas, nor pepper spray, and no pepper anything!
0:12   In my shop I offer alternate solutions, invented by yours truly.
0:16   For example: Candleholder nunchucks!
0:20   Come on, I’ll show you what’s what! With Candleholder Nunchucks.
0:24   Ahh, that hurts! What’s best against knives? Cutting board of course!
0:28   Think about it — All day long you cut stuff on it,
0:32   and the board stays as good as new.
0:36   Look! $150 and you will have full stabbing protection in the front and in the back.
0:40   AND when you get home, you can cut your salad in bed! Honey, want some pepper?
0:44   These days you have to be able to watch your six.
0:48   200 bucks will buy you peace of mind with these panoramic mirrors.
0:52   Warning: The terrorists in the mirror are closer than they appear.
0:56   But the best defence is to show the terrorists that they have no reason to get you.
1:00   Stunt knife wound! Move along, terrorist, sweetie!
1:04   See? I am good – Nothing to stab here! Raincheck?
 

3 thoughts on “Creative Self-Defense in Israel

  1. It looks like poor old France has gone from ‘Algerie francaise’ to ‘La France Algerienne’? Unfortunately the fifth column is massing on both sides of the channel so resistance is somewhat neutralized. Unless the Koran is fully exposed and banned for the pornographic hate manual that it clearly is and its followers for the murderous, racist sub humans that they are – we are eventually screwed. Bon voyage!

  2. This shows stoicism and reliance, as well as humour. That’s why Israel will prevail over its enemies. I think Christians also demonstrate these strengths and God willing will bring us through our tribulations in triumph over those who wish us nothing but harm.

  3. It strikes me that we, the readers, should thank Vlad Tepes and Oz-Rita (I hope I spelled that right and not backwards). We should thank them for all their work in helping us understand what is going in in this world by all their translating efforts.

    Thank you, Sir and Ma’am! (yes, I live in Kansas which explains the Ma’am)

    Maria

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