Club Med for Whiners

You’re a poverty-stricken peasant in Eritrea. Someone tells you about the amazing deal you can get in Europe, where they give you everything you want and you never have to work again. So you pay an extortionate amount of money to a trafficker, cross the desert to Libya, and board one of the rickety boats loaded with “refugees” heading for Italy.

The boat breaks down fifteen miles out and starts to sink — they almost always do — but it doesn’t matter, because the Italian coast guard or the Swedish navy rescues everyone who might otherwise drown, dropping their charges at the nearest European port of call, which is usually the island of Lampedusa.

The migration agency puts you up in a clean bed and gives you three squares while you wait for your case to be processed. You’re there for two weeks, basking in the sun and enjoying the sea breeze off the Med. Then what do you do?

Why, you stage a protest, of course! What else?

You demand your freedom, insist that your fingerprints not be taken, and call for the Islamic media to pay attention to your pitiful plight. And, if that doesn’t work, you jump into the sea.

After two weeks.

It makes me wonder what the Eritrean word for “chutzpah” is.

I showed the article below to Vlad, and he had a few choice words to say: “Jumped into the water in protest? From a beach in Lampedusa? I wish I could afford to! I haven’t been to a warm ocean beach for decades. I would LOVE a cold drink on a hot beach.”

I told him he should revert to Islam, get himself a beanie and a nightgown, and show up at a Libyan port. Of course, he’d have to fork over a few grand for the privilege of climbing aboard one of those overloaded leaky boats. But at least he could count on a nice warm vacation on Lampedusa, courtesy of the Italian coast guard.

Here’s the story from ANSA:

Eritrean Refugees Protest in Lampedusa

Want their freedom

(ANSA) — Palermo, October 9 — A group of about 50 migrants from Eritrea staged protests in the streets of Lampedusa on Friday, the third consecutive day of demonstrations by the group asking to leave the island.

The group chanted slogans including “freedom”, “no finger prints”, and “Al Jazeera contact us”.

On Thursday, divers rescued two men from the group who jumped into the water in protest.

The group has been in a migrant reception centre on the island for about two weeks.

Hat tip: Insubria.

9 thoughts on “Club Med for Whiners

  1. This form of protest is not new. It was used by people smugglers when instructing “refugees” climbing on boats to Australia. First you demonstrate to attract media attention, then you join a riot and destroy buildings, which the media will dutifully describe as a result of “frustration”, and finally when all else fails to get what is demanded, attempted “suicides” occur. Of course, these “suicide” attempts never quite do the job, and you recover to try it all over again.

    The demonstrations in Lampadusa is the first phase of this process.

    • Yes, they do like to get up on rooftops, threatening to kill themselves by jumping off.

      I suppose next we will see them actually throw off one of their number (some poor sap who has no clue what is about to happen to him) to drive home the point.

      The murder victim will then be lionized as a martyr whose suicide weighs heavily on Western consciences.

  2. I thought it was a requirement to take fingerprints?

    The simple option should be, you dont have to fingerprint, but you would have to have an DARPA RFID microchip implanted instead, inside your skull.

    We apologize for any inconvenience, and oh, while you’re at it, you must sign a imdemnity waiver!

    • I was fingerprinted in YUMA, Arizona, for attempting to cash a travellers cheque years ago, but then I’m always victimized for attempting to cross into the ‘good ol’ USA on a NZ passport!

      Even now, in 2015! I had no idea NZ was considered an enemy country. Wonder if Yanks are fingerprinted when they enter NZ?

  3. Sane people would not let this gimmegrants swarm land on European soil. Sane people would prevent the boats from leaving Africa and return any who slipped through the net to the nearest African port. And sane people would charge the cost of the effort and trouble they have caused.

  4. Just one question: Why were they rescued? They voluntarily jumped into the water so it must be where they want to be.

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