The Singing Gnomes of the Islamic State

The translator of this musical propaganda video in French says the singing of the Islamic State Butchershop Quartet sounds like the Vienna Girls Choir to her. But I’m convinced that it’s actually a chorus of garden gnomes who have switched their principal occupation from fishing to jihad.

Vlad watermarked the video with one of those falsetto soprano homunculi, Mehmet bin Mohammed. Watch the top left corner, and you’ll see him. His cousin Mahmoud the Gnomon from Oman is at the top of this post.

Many thanks to Oz-Rita for the translation and annotation, and to Vlad Tepes for the subtitling and additional annotation:

It’s nice to take a break from all the nastiness and grotesquerie and make fun of this stuff. But really, that’s just the way we whistle past the Islamic graveyard, which is stuffed full of sick horror 24/7. What else can we do?

Vlad has a few words to say about all this:

The dilemma that many Western leaders as well as Youtube and some other significant and influential people and organizations seem to be struggling with is whether or not to allow the publication of Islamic State or other jihadi materials online.

I certainly share the discomfort at some levels but not at others.

If we look at a country like England, which has a population of over fifty three million people, and then look at the number of residents in that country that have left to join jihad overseas or indeed decided to undertake jihad at home, and then remove the people who would have done it anyway without seeing any propaganda online but was either already an observant muslim or attended a mosque in which jihad was a central dogma (which would be close enough to all of them to say pretty much all of them) and then take the remainder which were ‘radicalized’ by online jihadi propaganda and, then to be 100% fair to the other side, multiply that number by say, 300, figuring that the governments probably hide from us just how many muslim converts actually do try to join the IS or wage jihad at home.

Now lets take that number, and again, to be fair lets call it high and say its 10,000 people.

I do not have the real number handy but I am pretty sure it’s less than half of that and maybe less than a tenth. At least officially.

Then look at the comments under any article about Islam, where they are still allowed at least, and compare them to comments on the same subject from 10 years ago and we see that when people are allowed to see the real ideology of islam and the actions it generates, the overwhelming majority of the population will be utterly repulsed by it and the feeble few, one in fifty three hundred if we accept my very high estimate for the easily influenced towards the enemy, is a tiny price to pay. My guess would be more British people joined the Nazis than that by proportion.

So I feel it is very important to make sure that what they say and do is seen by us to reduce the number of ‘useful idiots’ shilling for the jihad under the guise of political correctness or ‘anti-racism’. This however, does not mean we have to present their material respectfully. Truthfully yes, accurately, yes. But respectfully? Not on my watch.


0:00   We will not be beaten
0:04   We will not be beaten
0:08   We want to die for Allah. We will stay
0:12   to fight, leave with a smile
0:16   We will not be beaten, we want to die for Allah
0:20   We will stay to fight, leave with a smile
0:25   We will stay to fight, leave with a smile
0:29   Yes Charlie Hebdo is dead, they mocked
0:33   the prophet. Sure, we will kill without remorse
0:37   those who provoke us. Why did you provoke us?
0:41   You sow, you reap Those whose arms are charged:
0:45   the time has come to revolt
0:50   We will not beaten
0:54   we wanna die for Allah
0:58   We will not be beaten same blablabla again
1:02   and again blablabla
1:06   and again blablabla
1:10   and one more blablabla
1:15   We must get France, it is high time to
1:19   humiliate her, we want to see suffering
1:23   and thousands of dead. The battle is engaged
1:27   Revenge will be terrible, our ‘soldiers’ are enraged
1:31   Your end will be horrible
1:35   we will not be beaten
1:40   we wanna die for Allah… blablabla
1:44   repeat blabla
1:48   repeat bla we wanna die for Allahblabla
1:52   repeat …blabla-fight-smile-blabla
1:56   We will stay to fight, leave with a smile.
2:00   Islam will impose herself, spread by the sword
2:04   those who want to resist
2:08   will never know peace again. We have come to dominate
2:13   and our enemies will perish. We will eliminate them
2:17   and let their bodies rot
2:21   We will not be beaten
2:25   we wanna die for Allah
2:29   we will stay to fight and leave with a smile
2:33   and here they go again: blabla repeat blabla
2:38   blabla-fight-blabla-smile
2:42   we will blablablabla
2:46   leave with a smile.
2:50   inaudible (because the Vienna Girls Choir in the background is too loud).
2:54   inaudible…to support them and all that…
2:58   inaudible…inshalla…the Girls choir
3:02   and…inshalla…and…inaudible
3:07   and again: “inshalla” inaudible or Arabic
3:11   inaudible
3:15   something like “salamaleikum”
3:19   Leave with a smile. (note by translator): If only, and even without a smile.

7 thoughts on “The Singing Gnomes of the Islamic State

  1. Umm, Many years ago a song crept into the UK charts entitled “The Winkers Song (Misprint)” by Ivor Biggun and the Red Nosed Burglars. They came and played at our local a few times. This video reminds me a little of them. I occasionally borrow the song title to get around moderation while still stating my opinion of muslims.

  2. That’s the first time that I actually giggled about islam – “The Singing Gnomes of the Islamic State”….he he he, brilliant.

    Perhaps that’s the way to go: laugh at them – they have not evolved enough for a sense of humour and cannot bear humiliation. So lets humiliate them back into their caves.

    Yes, I know, too many dead lining their roads for laughter to be soustainable.

    But this was a good interlude, thank you 🙂

    • Hope some of this passes muster. What doesn’t is the Baron’s authority.

      Q. What do you call a moslims who owns a camel and a goat?
      A. Bisexual.
      Q. How do moslims practice safe sex?
      A. They sell the goats that bite.
      Q. What do mekka and Hiroshima have in common?
      A. Nothing, yet.
      Q. What do you call a moslims who owns 6 goats?
      A. A pimp.+
      Q. What is the difference between the prophet muhammad (mad mo) and Michael Jackson?
      A. One is a pedophile child rapist and the other recorded six platinum albums.
      Q: Why did Mohammed make homosexuality a sin in the Koran?
      A: Because his boyfriend thought that would make it hotter.
      Q: What do you get when you win a theological debate with a moslems?
      A: Death threats.
      Q: What did one moslems say to another in a supermarket?
      A: Nothing very interesting, they are both completely ordinary members of society who should not be judged based on their ethnic background and skin colour.
      And then the building exploded.
      “Muhammad come quick, there’s a wanted poster with your face on in the market square. It says you’re wanted for paedophilia.”
      Muhammad: “From this day forth, to draw Muhammad is blasphemous and shall be punishable by death.”
      I use a demolition company and I never have to pay the workers. All I do is spray paint ‘mohammad liked [posterior penetration]’ on the side of the building.

      Jeff Foxworthy on moslems:

      1. If you refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor, You may be a moslem.

      2. If you own a $3,000 machine gun and a $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford shoes, You may be a moslem.

      3. If you have more wives than teeth, You may be a moslem.

      4. If you wipe your butt with your bare hand but consider bacon to be unclean, You may be a moslem.
      5. If you think vests come in two styles: Bullet-proof and suicide. You may be a moslem

      6. If you can’t think of anyone you haven’t declared jihad against, You may be a moslem.

      7. If you consider television dangerous but routinely carry explosives in your clothing, You may be a moslem.

      8. If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs, You may be a moslem.

      9. If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four, You may be a moslem.
      A moslems dies and finds himself before the pearly Gates. He is very excited, as all his life he has longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed. Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, he meets a man with a beard.
      ‘Are you mohammed?’, he asks. ‘No, my son. I am Peter. mohammed is higher up.’ And he points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.
      Delighted that mohammed should be higher than Peter, he climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds coming to a room where he meets another bearded man.
      He asks again, ‘Are you mohammed? ‘No, I am Moses. mohammed is higher still.
      Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy, he continues to climb the ladder and, yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard.
      Full of hope, he asks again, ‘Are you mohammed?’ ‘No, I am Jesus…You will find mohammed higher up.’
      mohammed higher than Jesus! The poor man can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher once again, he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question:
      ‘Are you mohammed?’ he gasps, as he is by now, totally out of breath from all his climbing. ‘No, my son. I am God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a coffee?’
      ‘Yes, please, my Lord’
      God looks behind him, claps his hands and calls out: ‘ Hey, mohammed, two coffees!’

      • Totally tasteless, Musthava, and funny.

        Re the video: whatever became of the prohibition on music?

        • Martial music (vocal only) is permitted in Islam. No music for fun! And no musical instruments are allowed.

          I think there’s a hadith to justify this; not sure.

          • Thanks Baron. “Janissary” music, as represented by Mozart et al, had lots of instruments, especially percussion, but maybe someone didn’t read the manual.

            “Musthava” reminds me of a boys’ comic from the 1950s (forget which but some other Brit may remember); the villain, of Middle Eastern appearance, with a cigarette hanging from his lips, was called “Mustapha Fagg” (hope US readers don’t need a translation). Probably worth a fatwa nowadays.

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