A Solution to the Ebola Crisis?

President Obama spoke briefly to reporters after meeting with Ebola leaders at the White House earlier today. He said:

It’s crucial to engage Ebola in dialogue. American citizens need to understand how much we have in common with the virus.

The vast majority of Ebola organisms are peaceful. A tiny minority of extremists has hijacked a great disease and given it a bad name.

Therefore I have signed an executive order directing the CDC to work with moderate elements in the Ebola community to establish a just and lasting healthfulness.

The president declined to take reporters’ questions after making his remarks, saying that he was late for the first tee.

6 thoughts on “A Solution to the Ebola Crisis?

  1. Who says Americans don’t do irony? (mind you, some commenters on Jihad Watch- and one or two here- could do with a transplant, but I can’t vouch for their nationalities).

    • Why heavens to Betsy, we don’t irony…GoV is a serious website with gravitas. Humor would be misplaced in a blog with such well-earned pretensions.

      Nope, this be a rilly rilly real Report, funded by Mossad. And Mossad don’t do no humor atall, atall. Not even when they send us their bribes in caseloads of gefilte fish.

      Alla y’all* ought to know that by now. NO FUNNIES ON GATES OF VIENNA. Jabs and uppercuts aimed at Sweden and Norway don’t count.

      btw, r u seerius? JihadW has sum humur-mpared commenters? Lordy, what is the world coming 2?

      I’d better go lie down now. Those nice men are coming to take me for my regularly scheduled naptime.
      ‘yall means two people. ‘alla y’all means a group.

  2. And we have also made progress in dealing with ISIS. The best treatment is to contain it. We call it quarantine. If rogue elements break out of the quarantine area, we will expand the boundaries. It can never outrun the quarantine.

  3. That is very amusing Baron, like something Andrew Klavan would do at Truth Revolt.

  4. PETE, or People for the Ethical Treatment of Ebola, cheered the president’s remarks and have volunteered to host moderate Ebola strains themselves in a show of solidarity with the slandered hemorrhagic virus.

    No to Ebolophobia!” they shouted at the White House gate, -amid a few stray coughs.

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