I reported in last night’s news feed that the U.S. Army has been unable to find a bank in the Ft. Hood area willing to open an account for Major Nidal Hasan, the Killer Shrink of Fort Hood. The Army is required to deposit his monthly paycheck in a bank account, but for some reason the local banks are reluctant to accommodate Maj. Hasan.
HELLO I AM MAJOR NIDAL HASAN
YOU MAY BE SURPRISED AT HEARING FROM ME, AS WE HAVE NOT SPOKEN BEFORE, BUT I AM UNDERSTANDING THAT YOU ARE A PERSON OF TRUSTHWORTHYNESS.
I AM RECEIVING MONTHLY PAYMENTS OF OVER $6,000 A MONTH FROM THE UNITED STATES (U.S.) ARMY, BUT NO BANK WILL CASH THEM FOR ME.
IF YOU WOULD OPEN A BANK ACCOUNT IN MY NAME, I WILL SPLIT THE PROCEEDS WITH YOU 50/50.
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PLEASE REPLY IN UTTER CONFIDENCE.
MAJ. NIDAL HASAN
BELL COUNTY JAIL
111 WEST CENTRAL AVENUE
BELTON, TX 76513-3078
Maj. Hasan may want to read the proceedings of the 3rd Annual Nigerian EMail Conference to pick up some handy tips on conducting financial transactions in the traditional Nigerian fashion.