The global economic crisis has prompted a resurgence of right-wing extremism worldwide as frightened people reach for once-discredited ideologies in order to give themselves an illusory sense of control over their own destinies.
The reptilian community is the latest to succumb to lure of neo-fascism. Herpetologists all over the world are surprised and dismayed to see ordinary reptiles and amphibians turn to racist demagogues in their search for a new political order.
Sea turtles have proved to be particularly vulnerable to neo-Nazi ideology. Below is a photograph of Dr. Reinhard von Schildkröte giving the notorious salute as he holds an audience of starfish and sea snails rapt with his declamatory rhetoric:
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In response to media enquiries about this photograph, Dr. Schildkröte denies that he was giving a fascist salute. He maintains that he was actually attempting to “flip the bird” to his many detractors, but had forgotten that he has no fingers.
ok, i admit, i laughed at this.
He maintains that he was actually attempting to “flip the bird” to his many detractors, but had forgotten that he has no fingers.
Oh, I don’t know about that. I’m pretty sure LGF had something about Dr. Schildkröte being the head of the National Socialist Sea Turtle Workers’ Party. Better beware of this non-fingered fellow!
Brilliant. The Turtle Parties are Nazi rallies, everyone knows that. The swastika is an ancient symbol, just like tortoises, proving that they are the same. Moreover, what is the whole point of the shell? Separation, which is a Nazi idea. The turtle separates itself from the outside world. Rip the shells off. Integrate them. Yes, they will complain it kills them, but what price progress?
It’s been decades since I’ve heard anyone ask: “Are you a turtle?”
Ancient Order of Sea Turtles
Chuckles . . .blushes . . .[oy, don’t ask].
Heil Turtler!!!
Studs Turtle was unavailable for comment.